As America’s population grows older, a pressing issue remains too often overlooked: the unique challenges faced by LGBTQ+ older adults—particularly when it comes to protecting the rights of their partners. While great strides have been made in equality in recent decades, many older LGBTQ+ couples continue to encounter legal and social barriers that threaten their security, financial stability, and dignity as they age.
For LGBTQ+ older couples, the fight for partner rights is not simply about fairness—it is about survival.
Many LGBTQ+ people came of age in a time when being openly gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender was not only socially unacceptable but often criminalized. Same-sex relationships were hidden for fear of discrimination, violence, or legal consequences. As a result, many LGBTQ+ older adults lacked the opportunity to marry, co-own property, or build the same legal and financial protections that heterosexual couples often take for granted.
Even after the 2015 Supreme Court ruling in Obergefell v. Hodges legalized same-sex marriage nationwide, many older couples had already lived decades without the ability to legally protect their relationships. Some never married because of years of fear or uncertainty. For others, marriage came late in life—sometimes too late to fully benefit from spousal rights related to Social Security, pensions, or health care.
The lack of legal recognition for LGBTQ+ partnerships can have devastating consequences for older adults. For example, when one member of a couple becomes ill, the other may struggle to make medical decisions without legal documentation like a power of attorney or advanced directive. Without recognized next-of-kin status, partners may be excluded from hospital rooms or shut out of critical health care conversations.
Financial hardships are also common. Many Social Security and pension benefits are based on marital status and length of marriage, which can disproportionately disadvantage same-sex couples who were unable to legally marry for most of their lives. Inheritance laws may favor biological relatives over surviving partners unless proper legal documents have been prepared in advance—a step that many older adults, particularly those without access to legal counsel, may not have taken.
Housing presents another vulnerability. Surviving partners can face eviction or homelessness if they do not have formal ownership or rental agreements in place. In some cases, unsupportive family members may attempt to claim property or assets, leaving bereaved partners financially destitute.
Discrimination in long-term housing facilities also remains a significant issue. Some LGBTQ+ residents report harassment or neglect in nursing homes or assisted living communities that are not inclusive or trained to meet their specific needs. Ensuring that partners have the right to advocate for each other in these settings is critical to safeguarding their well-being.
Thanks to years of tireless advocacy, many protections have been put into place for LGBTQ+ couples, but gaps remain—especially for older adults who spent much of their lives unable to benefit from these rights. More needs to be done to ensure comprehensive legal recognition of partnerships, expanded access to financial and medical protections, and culturally competent care that respects and affirms LGBTQ+ identities.
Organizations such as SAGE (Services and Advocacy for GLBT Elders) continue to lead efforts to educate policymakers, caregivers, and the public about the importance of protecting LGBTQ+ couples. Legislative reforms, improved access to legal services, and targeted outreach can help address the lingering inequities faced by this vulnerable population.
At its core, ensuring LGBTQ+ rights for older adults is about honoring the dignity, love, and commitment that these individuals have shared—often in the face of tremendous adversity. As a society, we owe it to them to ensure that no one grows old fearing the loss of their home, their income, or their loved one simply because of who they love.
In the words of one elder advocate, “We have waited a lifetime for equality. As we age, we deserve nothing less than full dignity and protection for ourselves and the ones we love.”